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if we were having tea… // 25 March 2020

It’s been a while since I’ve spoken in a casual and chatty way, and I think it’s long overdue.

Many things have been happening in the world and I think we all could use a break from the news to just talk to each other and update on how we’re feeling/doing*.

Grab a hot cup of tea or coffee or any drink of your choice and settle down to hear some chatter from me.

*to keep things light, I will not be talking about the coronavirus situation itself. Maybe just some references, but all the talk will be about other things. We all need a break.

a steaming cup of tea gif

If we were having tea… I’d talk about my schedule nowadays which is CRAP. I sleep for 10 to 11 hours for no reason. Because I have no real time-sensitive work to do like internship or classes. I’m working on slowly resetting my schedule back to early timings, but it’s going in baby steps.

If we were having tea… you might have said “wait what?? I thought you were working from home for your internship?? That’s what you said in your last update?!” and you’d be right. I did say that, but a DAY after that my office decide to pause the internships for two weeks. We’re all scrambling to figure out our business plans and since many of us interns don’t have good internet connections where we stay, they gave us leaves. All the interns who stay away from family went back home.

My internship is paused until March 30th but we’re not sure if that will continue or whether we will resume. Let’s see.

If we were having tea… I would talk about how I need purpose to my days. Even if I’m on vacation, I like to know in advance so I’m prepared for not having work or focus on relaxing. Getting a sudden off from internship (and college classes are suspended as well) means that I’m suddenly free. I’m a planner and this was not nice to my brain and schedule. It took me a couple days of moping and sleeping too much to accept it and make a plan for the coming while.

I decided to take it as a vacation and make some progress on reading books, since I didn’t get much time to read before. I AM being a little productive everyday though because I’m a productivity-oriented person. Sleep won’t come to me unless I get something done. That something has been blogging for the most part, and reading. Now I’ve started working on my project for college as well.

rapunzel from tangled picking up books to read

If we were having tea… I’d share news about my college. Since all classes are suspended, we’ve moved online as well. But it’s a little weird for us because even normally we had only few hours of classes three days a week. And barely anyone that because most students have internship Monday to Friday.

Hence, we don’t really care about videos and lectures because it’s a foregone conclusion that we’ll be basically studying on our own from notes. We only had to worry about assignments and stuff. We haven’t even bothered to consider online classes haha.

But now we’ve been given reading material day-wise and assignments every week (before it was once two to three weeks). This is so weird. I’m going to be actually doing classwork for the first time this semester.

falling face-first onto bed

If we were having tea… You’d learn all about Twitter prom! A while back this tweet went viral which suggested having prom online since most events are cancelled in real life. We deserve some sort of celebration, yeah? Even with social distancing.

The tweet went viral with A LOT of people showing interest. A discord server was made for it called twitter prom (but on discord) and there are thousands of people on it now. Kudos to the moderators who have worked hard to properly moderate, give people roles depicting age, pronouns and sexuality.

Twitter prom is just an excuse to hang out, though. Strangers hang online on the text and/or voice channels and can make friends too. I have seen people asking out others to the twitter prom randomly haha. The actual prom happened at 4:30am (for me) today and because of the timing I wasn’t a part of it. No clue how it went.

I’ve been hanging on the channel to listen to music with others and play skribble with them sometimes. There are ALWAYS people just listening to music together I just join in whenever and have a fun time. I’ve also made some new friends! They have good taste in music, so that’s good. We have fun 🙂

Michelle from Full House dancing with excitement!

If we were having tea… I’d tell you that my Bangalore book club made a new Instagram page (follow us here!) and we’re super excited to start over. This time with better graphics and ALL the enthusiasm.

In fact, we’re currently in the middle of our first readathon! Since today is a holiday for most Indians as it’s a festival (hence no work from home as well), we thought today would be good to start small. This readathon goes on for 12 hours—10am to 10pm—and the goal is to read for SIX hours.

As I write this, we’re already almost three hours in and I HAVEN’T STARTED. This is partly because I stayed up until 3:30am reading and only woke up at 10:30am. I’ll start reading as soon as I finish this post. The book that I’ll be reading is Tatiana & Alexander by Paullina Simmons because I need a readathon to actually finish it. I left it partway a week back and haven’t returned.

If we were having tea… we would probably bond over boredom of staying at home. I’m envying the people who are quarantined with friends and their significant others because being with my mum not is not very fun. I MISS MY FRIENDS. I miss their faces. I suggested doing an online coffee/tea hangout (kind of like this post!) so let’s hope that happens. It’s not that I have much to say, but I miss hearing random things about them and I miss us all discussing things and ribbing each other.

animated cat sighing.

If we were having tea… I’d ask you to safe safe and healthy! The situation all around the world isn’t good right now and we need to keep ourselves healthy and happy. Mental health is just as important as physical health.

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What would you tell me if we were having tea (or coffee) right now?

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The Sunday Post // a very EVENTFUL week

Last week was honestly SO LONG.

I’m spending today just trying to recover from everything haha. So many things happened that I need a whole day (or a whole blog post) to just process everything.

The Sunday Post is a weekly meme hosted by Caffeinated Book Reviewer.

Let’s jump right in!


Last Sunday, I met up with my book club and it was SO NICE. We headed to a year-round book fair first and some of us bought books there.

After that, we had a long lunch and hangout in a new place. The food was quite nice, but the drinks were the highlight. I got cold chocolate and it was great.

And to finish up the meet, we went to our regular bookstore haunt haha. I sold back a couple of my books and got two new ones. Super excited to read them!

All-in-all, it was a really good day. I met two members for the first time ever too.


It was my mum’s birthday on Wednesday. Since I’m now getting a stipend from my internship, of course I had to get her a gift.*

There’s a superstition in our culture that says don’t buy anything on Tuesdays. I don’t follow it but my mum does. Hence, I went shopping on Monday after office hours. I made sure to do an earlier shift so I could go shopping for mum.

After hitting multiple stores in a shopping street near the office, I found a bag that matched all the specifications my mum would like. And I got it in a really pretty peach colour too!

I couldn’t hide the bag since it’s big so my mum noticed it the second I walked into our home. So I gave it to her then itself. She loved it. I’m happy 🙂

*We generally don’t gift on birthdays in my family. It’s always like that. We just wish and have good food if we can.


Or rather, it was stolen.

I was on my way to the metro station on Friday morning when it disappeared from my bag. After reaching the station, I realized that one of my bag’s pocket zips was open and found out that my wallet was missing.

Assuming that I hadn’t closed the pocket which led to it falling, I went back searching the entire way. But I didn’t find it. I went to the police station nearby to lodge a complaint too.

Just in case, I searched the way twice more. But yeah, it was gone by then. I went back home and blocked my card which was in the wallet. And then I went to my office.

My mum and I were just thinking how could I have lost it. After figuring out logistics, we concluded that it was stolen and not lost. But yeah, I learnt to be careful about where I keep my wallet in the bag.

And in the panic about the wallet, I misplaced my scarf somewhere.

All of it took about two hours so I reached the office a couple hours late. Thankfully, I didn’t miss anything important. But yeah, it was a bad start to the day.

I did get a message in the evening that someone tried to use my card but the transaction was declined since I blocked it. And there was just a little cash and no ID cards in the wallet. Phew.


This was yesterday (Saturday). I wasn’t in the mood to wear ethnic so I wore a nice jumpsuit and went. I was one of the very few not wearing Indian ethnic but who cares. I looked good.

My friends and I took a ton of pictures and danced to music. After that, we went to a mall for a late lunch. And we ended the day with drinks at a nearby restropub.

The highlight of the day was definitely my drink haha. It was called Earl Grey Mixture. It was basically Earl Grey tea, Whiskey, and Ginger Ale. And I absolutely loved it. Credits to my friend Ronj for finding it in the menu and telling me.


It’s been a cycle of office and home. I still haven’t gotten down a routine where I’m productive and that SUCKS. I need to especially start working on my project for college. Aaargh. If I could have Hermione’s time turner right now, it would be great.

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How was your week? Tell me in the comments!

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The Sunday Post // blogging, studying, REPEAT

Hey everyone!

It’s been quite a while since I did a Sunday post. While my last week hasn’t been full, I do have updates so let’s get onto it!

The Sunday Post is a weekly blogging meme hosted by Caffeinated Book Reviewer.


My lab finals are over!!! I am done with ALL MY LABS IN COLLEGE. In Engineering. I. am. done. We don’t have any labs to take next semester, so I’m super glad. To be honest, the labs weren’t all that bad, but some labs were pretty difficult. Good to see it all done with.

While I’m done with my labs, theory is still left. Theory finals start tomorrow and while I’m nervous, I also want time to go by really quick and be done with them. The sad part is that my finals go on for a while. The last final is on the 1st of Jan. Yes, no holidays for Christmas and no scope for a New Year’s Eve celebration. Also no real celebration for my birthday. But, this is the last year we have to deal with this. After this year, no more exams during holidays and birthdays*. Woohoo!

*can you tell that I’m waiting for college to end?


Y’all. I do not remember Blogmas being this hard. The last time I did it was also when I had finals in college, but I remember it as this easy breezy thing! I guess we can attribute it being harder now to the fact that I spend a lot more time on every blog post than I used to.

The one thing that has kept me going is planning. I am making sure I plan out my next blogging steps every single day. This has helped me blog two posts on some days, allowing me to take off on other days.

In the last few days, I’ve been super charged on blogging and planning to schedule blog posts in advance so that my final on 19th doesn’t get affected. The subject on that day is pretty hard* and I struggle with it. Need to give it all my attention, so I cannot worry about blogging.

So my routine has become blogging and studying, with breaks in the middle for reading and Netflix.

*only half the students passed last year. whelp.

On another note, is it just me or is there lesser interactivity during blogmas this time? I remember in 2017, and even 2018, the hype and talk about blogmas was SO MUCH. Bloggers were constantly blog-hopping and commenting and making new friends. While I didn’t participate last year, I still went around checking out a lot of blogs. That cheer and interaction seems to be missing this time.

One of the reasons blogmas is helpful for bloggers is because it brings in a lot of traction and gives more exposure to blogs. It’s an event where, if you participate, your blog will certainly grow and you’ll get more views during the event. But this time, I’m noticing lesser traction than even on other months. And I know it’s not just my blog because I’ve been noticing a lack of comments on other blogs as well when I blog-hop.

So yeah, that’s saddening to see.


Would Like to Meet by Rachel Winters. This book was on my radar before it’s release because it sounds so good, and it had some hype amongst the romance readers. I was not disappointed AT ALL. This book is super cute, has a very new plotline which I haven’t seen before, and it gave me all the good feels.

I reread Rock Solid by Carly Phillips and Erika Wilde because I was in the mood for a feel-good book but without any suspense because I needed to get back to studying. Exam times are usually when I reread books because I’m guaranteed to love them and since I know how they end, I’m not compelled to say “just one more chapter” instead of studying.

Other than the Goodreads Reading challenge, I also do the A-Z Reading Challenge every year. This year I was SO CLOSE without consciously trying, with 24 out of 26 letters done. The left over letters were Q and Y, and I thought I’d quickly finish them up so I can complete this challenge for the first time EVER.

The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman is a short story which I already had on a recommendation, but didn’t read yet even though I’ve had it for a long time. Since it’s short and fits the prompt, I finally read it. It was a very interesting and insightful read.

The last book I read was Queen of Nothing by Holly Black. I was planning on reading this anyway but I read it earlier to finish the challenge. Since I read it very fast, I didn’t have time to analyze things as I read. I thought I liked it when I finished the book, but once I started discussing with a friend and actually thought about it, my opinions changed.

While the plot was good, I hated the ending and the book felt quite rushed. My friend and I agree that it could have been done much better because The Wicked King had set up everything perfectly. This book was a let-down after The Wicked King.


Meal times are when I actually spend time watching Netflix. So thrice a day I open Netflix to watch one episode every time. Since it’s exam time and I need to NOT have a binge-able show*, I needed a show which didn’t have continuity.

Enter Tiny House Nation. Interiors-based show sounded like a good option, plus I love aesthetics. I started it a couple weeks back and it’s REALLY GOOD. Without realizing, I finished it a couple days back and I was SO SAD. It’s too good a show and I wish it had many more episodes.

After Tiny House Nation, I needed another such show to watch. I considered going back to Queer Eye, which I stopped in season 2. But the episode that I started with was intense and I need no emotions. The intensity reminded me that almost every episode of Queer Eye made me cry before, and hence I stopped it again.

On a friend’s insistence, I started Sugar Rush yesterday. It’s good, but the episodes feel very draggy and too long, even though they’re the same duration as Tiny House Nation episodes. It’s just not as captivating. I’ll give it a few more chances and then see if I should find a new show.

*I’m a huge binge-watcher and won’t leave until I finish the show if it has continuity.

And that’s it for my updates this week!

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How was your week? Did you watch or read anything?

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if we were having tea… // 04-12-2019

It’s Blogmas day 4!

While I did plan out most of the days for blogmas, I left a few to spontaneous posts, and today is one of them. When I was blogging consistently and putting out three posts a week a long time back, the one thing I missed was spontaneous blog posts. I nailed down the planning and scheduling part, but it meant that every post of mine was written at least a week in advance, leaving me no room for current updates posts.

Lifestyle posts are some of my favourite. I really love just typing casually like I’m having a conversation with y’all. And if we were having tea is perfect because it’s what I would be telling you if we were having tea together in person. I suggest getting a hot tea while reading this, because I’m drinking tea while writing this and it’ll complete the whole vibe haha.

a steaming cup of tea gif

If we were having tea… you would see me bundled up in multiple layers and struggling to breathe because I’m sick. The last time I fell sick, I ended up in the ER because my throat infection triggered my swelling to grow in a very fast rate. Doctors specifically told me to NOT. FALL. SICK. until my surgery is done. But, my immunity system is horrible so I’m sick again.

I went to the doctor ASAP and got meds, and I’m being very careful about exposing myself to the cold now. It’s been about a week now, and while I’m better than before, my cold shows no sign of reducing. Sigh. The tea we’re having definitely helps. Hot drinks are saviours for my nose and throat.

Now, every time I go out, I wear a full sleeved thick top, a wool sweater above it, a wool scarf, and a beanie. All of it to keep myself very warm. But hey, I’m using this to constantly wear my Ravenclaw beanie haha.

If we were having tea… I’d complain about the weather being SO COLD. It’s freezing in the mornings! I live in Bangalore, and we’re known for having consistently gloomy weather and light showers throughout the year. But this year, the summer was actually hot and there was no rain. The trade off is that the winter is colder than ever, which is not good for all of us because we’re used to pleasantly cold winters. Not freezing cold winters.

To properly understand how our weather is throughout the year, you should notice our wardrobes. We have normal clothes, and a few jackets. Light ones for summer and spring, thicker ones for the winter. But our thick ones are nowhere near to the actual thick jackets people in other areas wear. We don’t have summer and winter clothes! It’s all the same! Which is why I’m struggling with this winter. I have a total of 1 woolen sweater, and its not even that thick.

"tis the season to be a walking marshmallow" gif

If we were having tea… I’d tell you that my final exams started. I finished one of my lab finals yesterday, and it was the hardest lab I’ve ever had. I’m so glad it’s done. I have the next one on 10th (yeah we have HUGE gaps, it’s kind of annoying because our exams go on for a month). After that, my theory finals start on the 16th. I haven’t started studying for my theory at ALL, and considering how many classes I missed this semester, I really should start studying.

If we were having tea… you would hear about my reading. I’ve been in a huge reading slump, and I read only 2 books last month. I was actually quite ahead on my Goodreads reading challenge, but I’m quite behind now. I have 11 books left to reach my goal, and I’m not sure if I’ll be able to complete the goal. With exams, and blogging every day for Blogmas, not much time is left to read 11 whole books. This might become the first time I don’t reach my reading goal.

But. I am attempting to get as close to my goal as possible. Last night, I started reading The Gilded Wolves by Roshani Chokshi. For the last few month, the books I’ve been reading have been adult and mostly romance. I’ve lost touch with the YA world, especially YA fantasy which used to be my favourite genre. I really miss it so I’m trying to dive back into it now.

If we were having tea… I’d share a new lofi mix with you. I came across it on YouTube without even looking for lofi mixes, but it’s SO GOOD. I found it two days back, when I was studying for my exam, and it’s helped so much. The whole time I was studying and revising, this song was playing and helping with my concentration. Even the title is so nice! Also the artwork is pretty cool.

If I were to pick a time of the day/night to listen to this, I’d say very early morning. I woke up at 5:30am yesterday and was revising with this music. It was perfect. The comments section is also really nice.

If we were having tea… I’d say that I’m looking forward to 2020. While 2019 has been good for me in many ways, which does not include health, I’m more excited about what’s to come. 2020 is the year I’ll graduate from college, and start working. It’s the year when I’ll get some independence with respect to money, and be able to start taking care of my mum instead of the other way round. Right now, I feel like I’m in a limbo. We’re in a house we don’t like, and we want to move but we’re waiting for me to graduate. I’m in college but all I can think about is how my work life will be. Especially since I already have a job lined up, which also gives me a paid internship starting next month until I graduate, I’ve almost left college behind.

My friends have started being nostalgic, and while I can relate, my thoughts are towards the future. I’ve always been like that. I enjoy the present, think about the future, and only become nostalgic of a farther past. I started becoming nostalgic about high school only two years after I finished it. While I don’t know about college nostalgia, I do know that I’m not someone to be nostalgic in advance. Some of my friends miss the current day while we’re still having fun. They’re like I’m going to miss this so much, when we technically still have 6 months of college left!

All I can think about is the new decade, and all the changes and opportunities it’ll bring.

If we were having tea in person right now, what would you tell me?

What Blogging Is Actually Like // 10 TRUE FACTS About Blogging

Blogging is a diverse a activity. Not only does it involve writing blog posts, it brings in photography, planning, formatting, social media, and so much more.

As someone who has been blogging for four years, the one thing I can say for sure is that your list of to-dos for blogging increases with time. I started off with small blog posts, and then I found out that there’s something called stats and SEO. There’s something called “readability” such that your blog posts are more appealing and easy to read. After that, I went on a research spree about metadata and hashtags, which lead me to social media, which lead to a whole range of other things.

But, leaving the to-do lists, what is blogging? What is it like to be a blogger? What do we struggle with, and what confuses us? That’s what this post is about. Today we’re talking about 10 things that show exactly what blogging is like, other than the basic activities.


Blogging is a hobby, and a wonderful one. But let’s face it, all bloggers get hit with the treat-blogging-like-a-job syndrome, whether we like it or not.

The sheer number of blogs on the internet, in every field, means that we’re all fighting for attention. And most of the time, it’s each other’s attention. At some point, we begin to care about statistics and how many views our blogs receive. As we care more, we also put in more and more effort into our blogs. Keeping up with indexes, images, and coming up with new posts every week is not easy. Soon enough, it’s as taxing as a full-time job.

Blogging as a hobby becomes as demanding as a job. You need to be extra motivated to keep up. But, it’s also SO REWARDING. Just watching the final post, and watching it get views and comments is the best feeling ever. You can almost immediately see the results of your hard work.

"I hate doing work but, I love being flattered." gif
An apt Parks and Rec GIF


I doubt that there is even one seasoned blogger who hasn’t done this. Stats is a funny thing. It can make you feel like you’re on top the world, but it can also make you feel like you suck.

Some months, when I’m consistently blogging and putting my ALL, the stats go up and I become SO HAPPY. But when life takes over my priorities, and my blog suffers, the stats shut down and it makes me feel so low.

There are several blog posts that say the number 1 thing you have to stop doing is obsessing over stats. That goes for everyone, whether you’re a new blogger or an experienced one. But, saying is harder than doing it, right? Who here relates?

don't care gif


Have you ever written a super cool post? One that you were excited about before even starting? A post that sounds so fun or great to you that you went all out—editing multiple times, adding anecdotes and jokes, and making sure the images are ON POINT. It’s that post which you expect would go viral, or at least be popular.

And have you seen that post under-perform? It’s the most confusing thing ever! Like, I’ve spent three days on perfecting the post but WHY AREN’T PEOPLE LIKING IT. Let me know your experiences in the comments, because I’m sure some of us will have this in common.

can we ask why gif


I think I can say that most of us have definitely had this moment. One of those posts that you simply wrote to post something, which you didn’t proof-read or even add proper images to. You simply wrote it, and hit publish. Why is THAT receiving tons of attention? More than other, better posts?

Sometimes, it’s just so weird. One of my posts which had barely 300 words and 2 images, which wasn’t even proof-read, actually went on to be the first link in a popular google search term! I was baffled. It still continues to bring in views from search engines, and I’m STILL not sure why.

I'm so confused gif


This is one thing that I always struggle with—not being able to regularly read other blogs and comment. I do read pretty often, but I don’t spend much time on it every time. And lately, I’ve not been able to blog hop much. I try here and there but it’s not how much I’d like to be doing. I mean, why should I expect others to visit my blog when I don’t visit theirs?

And, this is a continuous struggle! I don’t comment for three days and the guilt starts piling up. Tell me if you relate to this, because I can’t be the only one.

sad sign gif


This is SO HARD. You could pour your heart out writing book reviews, but if your readers like discussion posts more, you’ll obviously try to do them more.

At some point, my content has changed to reflect what receives more views. Not all of my content comes from my head or my passion. Some content comes from other posts which have received lots of comments. When I realize that a certain type of post is liked by people, I try to write those more. My blog today is SO DIFFERENT than what I started with.

As a blogger, you have to find a fine balance. How much are you willing to change your content in order to get more attention? What if you completely change your blog only to realize that your loyal readers loved your true style from before? Such questions keep me thinking at random times.


In the beginning, even when I finally decided to tell my friends that I blog, I didn’t actually open my mouth and say “go check it out”. I would just off-handedly mention that I’m blogging or something. In fact, for the longest time, even my best friends didn’t follow my bookstagram. And I couldn’t make myself ask them to follow me.

“Am I promoting myself or am I being annoying? Is this appropriate? Will it look like I’m showing off? What if they don’t want to follow me?”

I know people, online and offline, who SLAY on self-promotion. But me? I hesitate so much! I just cannot promote myself every where. I mean, I don’t talk well to many people in the first place. The introvert life hitting hard. I could count the number of times I’ve self-promoted in my two hands, and I’ve been blogging for four years.


You have a specific idea on how your graphics should look for a post, and you spend a lot of time on getting them PERFECT, without realizing the time. You didn’t have to, but you did.

A lot of bloggers are perfectionists. The fact that the whole world will be seeing our content spurs us on to do our best. Graphics play a huge role in how a blog post looks. You may have amazing content written, but it would definitely look better to readers with pretty graphics that break up the paragraphs.

The header image makes SO MUCH of an impact as well. It took me a long time to find my style of headers. Until then, I spent a lot of time on each, trying out different templates on Canva and different background images. I did take an hour on multiple occasions.

this has got to be perfection gif


Can I get a hell yeah for this? Because it’s SO TRUE.

Because blogging involves so much more than just typing, it’s a big commitment. It takes a lot of time to do all the things associated with blogging.

Before I began blogging, I already had a few hobbies. And blogging takes up so much time! I literally don’t paint, sketch, or doodle anymore. I used to at least be a little artsy before, but I don’t now because I spend all my time on this blog. As of now, all my hobbies are blogging-related. We can put reading under the same umbrella because this is partially a book blog. Blogging is my sole hobby at this point.

On a related note, it’s hard enough to manage one hobby while being a student or working long hours, but it’s harder to do anything other than blogging if you’re a blogger too.

typing gif


I am so guilty of this.

Almost every time I look at new blogs, I come across such COOL blogs. They have beautiful interfaces, graphics, and colour schemes. Once I read their content? I’m done for. At this point, there is a long list of bloggers whom I look up to. They do GREAT at blogging. Content? On point. Timing? On point. Personality shown through the content? Super engaging. I cannot deal.

No matter what blog, I almost always find something to take away. An improvement that I can do, or some inspiration.

It may also cause imposter syndrome. When I first found paperfury, I was IN AWE. I immediately tried being more funny, and using more formatting to add comments and stuff. While it was fun to blog that way, eventually I realized that it wasn’t me. It took me a while to find a happy medium. I blog in my own style, while adding small things to my style, instead of copying someone else’s.

Me @ other bloggers

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Do you relate to any of these points? Are there any facts that I missed? Tell me in the comments!

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I’m back from my hiatus!

At least, I hope I am. I can’t tell for sure yet.

It’s been exactly two weeks since my last blog post, and I had promised to blog more in that post. Ha. What a joke.

So, what’s been happening? Why am I just disappearing into the void without a peep on Instagram or Twitter as well? It’s because of my health. Two days after my last post, on 29th October, I was rushed to the emergency ward for breathlessness. I couldn’t breathe unless I was lying on my back. Even if I managed the breathlessness for a while, my head started hurting BAD every time I lifted it.

My swelling had increased in the night to the point that it was pushing on my throat, causing the breathing problems. It was also so heavy that it was pulling at my head when I sit up, causing headaches.

We rushed to the hospital where we consulted the ENT doctor before, but after reaching there we found that ALL DOCTORS WERE OFF. What hospital gives a public holiday???? I had to be admitted due to my breathing, and once I was started on antibiotics I couldn’t keep ANY food in me. That sucked too. I was puking everything up within an hour.

I have so much more to say about that 3 day hospital stay, but I’ve complained about it to my friends enough and I’ll spare y’all the details. It was a BAD experience, though.

Fast forward two weeks to today. I’ve been to two other hospitals, and consulted a few other speacialist doctors. We decided that I need to get a surgery ASAP, and it will be under general anesthesia. But for that, my thyroid levels need to be in range. Now, that’s a problem again. Although I don’t have hyperthyroid anymore (new discovery!! my T4 level is back to normal!!), my thyroid stimulating hormone level is still VERY LOW. No doctor is able to figure out why, and I’ve just been taking tests and more tests for it. I just want to get the surgery done at this point. Sigh.

I also have a lot of work to do for college, barring studying. I haven’t attended classes in two weeks, haven’t done any assignments and haven’t worked on my projects. I’m so behind on everything, and I need to get a LOT of work done before I go in for my surgery (which will probably be in a week?).

To be honest, I could have at least done assignments, but one thing was stopping me. When I was in the hospital, they gave me antibiotics through an IV line at my right hand. The large number of injections and the continuous drips caused the back of my right hand to swell up badly. We changed the IV canula to my left hand, but it was pretty late. I couldn’t bend my fingers or grip anything. It took until YESTERDAY for me to make a loose fist. I tried writing yesterday and I barely got through 200 words before my hand was strained. I couldn’t grip the pen properly. And we do all our assignments by hand (yes, I know, what a stupid rule).

I will attempt to write again today. I also have to work on my projects because deadlines are approaching fast, and I have nothing done. And neither have my teammates done anything, don’t ask me why though. I was under the impression that they would do something but apparently not. This is why I hate working in teams 🙂 And this is the one semester I need my teams in place.

So. That was the update on the physical health front. What about my mental health? Well, I’m hanging in there. Barely, but I’m surviving. I’ve been spending all my free time either watching something. I don’t know why, but I haven’t been able to read much. I haven’t felt like reading either. I’m in a huge reading slump, and I don’t know if I’m even close to getting out of it.

The one thing I’m really unable to do right now, is recharge mentally. I grew up with a lot of time to myself, and an abundance of “space”. Both my parents worked and I would be alone at home for long periods of time. As I grew up, I got used to and I started relying on that alone time. I need time to myself to recharge, without anyone around me to comment or make conversation with. I need time where I don’t have to keep up a positive pretense. And mostly, I require the time to cry if needed. A good cry helps a lot.

But lately, I’ve not had one second to myself. My mum has retired from her job, which means she’s home all the time. She’s even let go of her social activities to take care of me. And while I really appreciate it, the lack of space is getting to me. My mum’s overprotective of me. Even if I itch my leg in front of her, she asks me what happened, what’s wrong. And I also don’t want to burden her with my sadness through all this, because she worries enough herself. I can’t get her more down, so I’ve been the more positive person. And it’s taxing me. I’m at the last straw and I just… want some time alone so I can properly cry or read a book or ANYTHING. But alone.

I doubt it’ll happen, though. Mum’s not leaving me alone unless she has to, and since we’re back to living with my dad, he’s at home a majority of the time as well. He’s of no help to me or has no concern of me, but he’s home which means I still can’t do whatever I want. I usually have to retreat to the bedroom when he’s home, so that makes me feel even more trapped.

Fun times, eh?

Through the last few harrowing weeks, the one thing I’ve been able to count on is support from my friends. Y’all. I cannot even elaborate on HOW HELPFUL my amazing friends have been. They’re always there with emotional and physical support, always ready to help when I ask, and they’re keeping up to date with my tests and everything. I’ve called upon them several times now, because it’s hard to manage running around in hospitals with just my mum. I was no use physically and mentally, and my mum couldn’t do everything alone. My friends stepped in to help and that made so much difference.

Anyway! On to other things.

I’m trying my best to get back into reading. I remembered only yesterday that I have a blog tour coming up this week and I HAVEN’T EVEN READ THE BOOK YET! Welp. I need to finish it ASAP and write a review for the tour. I’m definitely doing that, so you’ll definitely see me soon.

The hectic two weeks with a bad right hand also meant that I couldn’t bullet journal. My bujo is frozen in time at 27th October. I haven’t been able to set up for November, and I’m unsure if I even will at this point. I’m so not up to spending energy on one more thing, and won’t unless I HAVE to.

On the blogging front, I do have ideas but I don’t have the energy to spend on blog posts. It took me two days of mental preparation to write this blog post. Trust me, I’m tired already. I still haven’t gone back to my normal self who doesn’t need naps every day and can run around all day. So, will I be blogging thrice a week like I was doing last month? I don’t know. My stats are taking a huge hit due to the lack of posts, but it’s not a priority right now. I’ll need to work back to it after my finals, because my finals will start right after I’ve recovered from surgery. It’s going to be a hectic two months.

Linking this for The Sunday Post.

How have you been lately? Has anything great or happy happened in the last couple weeks? Tell me your updates in the comments!

My Top Ten BTS Songs

I’ve been an ARMY since Epiphany released and I haven’t looked back since.

It’s been a year and a half, and while I don’t keep up with everything BTS*, I manage to know the highlights. It’s the only band that I’ve consistently been following. Usually, I move on to others pretty quickly. So yes, BTS is damn good.

*let’s be honest, it would take every minute of every day because there is SO MUCH happening with BTS. That’s not counting the backlog of BTS things to be updated on.

I’ve been wanting to make a post about my favourite songs by BTS for a while now. I just want to talk more about these AWESOMESAUCE songs, okay?! And I’m totally inviting more discussion and fangirling about BTS.


My #1 song by BTS will ALWAYS be Epiphany. It’s the first song by them which I REALLY liked, even though I had heard a few before. Epiphany’s lyrics, tune, and Jin’s voice sealed the deal for me.*

I highly recommend this song if you haven’t heard to it, even if you don’t like BTS or Kpop. Read the lyrics as well. I love the self-love in it.

*fun fact: Jin is also my bias. He has always been, and I’ve just liked him more and more from the beginning.


If you’re an ARMY, I think you will agree with me that Spring Day is on every ARMY’s top ten songs. It’s too good a song. It gives sad feels, nostalgic feels, hopeful feels, and some other feels that I can’t even name. I get into a specific mood every single time I listen to it, and I NEVER get bored of it. Spring Day is a must-listen BTS song, in my opinion.


This song, y’all…. what a great song. If you don’t know, this is a Japanese song by BTS. And IT. IS. BEAUTIFUL. I could cry. What a great song. I don’t have words for it.


Another song about self-love like Epiphany, but with much different vibes. It’s very hopeful and cheery, and I just love listening to it. It never fails to make my mood better. Love Myself is the song to listen to every day just to set the mood of the day. It adds a spring to my step, I kid you not.


This is a song from BTS’s latest album Persona: Map of the Soul and it’s just B E A U T I F U L. I love the vocals, and I even love the rap. I’m not someone who usually likes rap but they way BTS raps alongside the vocals is so nice. I became obsessed with Jamais Vu right from the first listen.


I won’t lie, fast-paced songs are usually not my favourite. Even if I do like them, it’s short lived. Mellow songs are more my type.

That said, there’s something addicting about Dionysus and I CAN’T GET ENOUGH. Every time I’m remotely in mood for fast paced songs, I listen to this. It hypes me up so much lol. I feel ready to take on the world after listening to it. I feel badass.


I actually didn’t like this song much the first time I heard it. I even played this on Superstar BTS multiple times and didn’t become attached to it. But then one day, I suddenly found myself singing it and I couldn’t recall it’s name! I typed the lyrics on youtube and got it, and that was when I started liking it. It barely took a few listens for me to love it.

Now, I absolutely love the song. I’ve taken to listening to it after Crystal Snow.


The only other fast-paced song on my favourites is Run. I can’t tell you why, but I just love it. Right from the video showing the friendships and BTS’s alternate universe story, to the beats, to the lyrics. I love it.


This song is part of the album mono by RM, one of the members. First of all, CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS ALBUM’S THEME?? The vibes, the titles with only small letters and no spaces and the tunes… wow. RM is brilliant. He’s my #2 BTS member.

Second, I just love the hope given by this song. Everything goes, everything will be okay. What a wholesome song. I listen to it whenever I need a slow pick me up. Just something to get me through the day or night.


I like listening to this right before sleeping. It always makes me calm and slows me down, which is perfect for night time. I also listen to it when I want to cry or when I’m sad, because that’s the exact vibe of the song.

Bonus favourites!

Yes yes I know I said 10 but there are a couple more songs that I just HAVE to mention. They deserve it.

Young Forever with the sad, regretful, and yet hopeful vibes. Perfect for millenials lol. I resonate with it so much, even without the lyrics. Just the tunes and the voices. The melody. I love it.

This is a SAD song. I usually only listen to it when I’m sad or about to cry, because it evokes those feelings in me. And it’s not a good idea to listen to it when happy haha. I love the lyrics, though. The melody, the rap and the lyrics go so well together.

And those were my top ten BTS songs!

What are your favourite songs by your #1 band? Share your BTS favs with me in the comments as well!

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The Sunday Post // what a busy week

Hey everyone!

I have SO MUCH to tell y’all today. It has been a VERY BUSY week. I actually lost track of days. On Friday, I thought it was Wednesday. I lost sense of time and days. It’s been pretty hectic.

In fact, I’m writing this in the middle of the night. I’ll tell you why further in the post.

The Sunday Post is a weekly blogging meme hosted by Caffeinated Book Reviewer for updating our readers on our past week.


I had my last two tests on Monday. Our tests had been going on for over a week and I was ready to be done. One was good and the other was okay-ish. Just glad that it got done.


It’s very generous to say “day” because it was only a few hours after our last test, but we did chill out. A couple of my friends and I went to a tea place nearby called “Infinitea” and tried a tea flavour called Tropical Delight. It was pretty good. It was an experience. The tea was bitter/sour in the beginning and as I reached the bottom of my cup, it became sweeter. The last sip was very sweet.

We were too broke to afford the food in that place so we headed out and had some good street food. It had been long since I had street food so that was cool too.


I headed to another city for just a day with my mum and uncle. We had to do some pooja (religious ritual) for my maternal grandparents who have passed away. It was damn tiring and I had absolutely no sleep.

We took an overnight train there, did the pooja through the day, and took an overnight train back. We also had to fast until the ritual was done so we didn’t eat until 3pm, by which we were COMPLETELY EXHAUSTED and I just wanted to come home. Oof.

We reached back home at 7 in the morning, after which I actually decided to go to college. Yes, I know. How stupid. No sleep for two nights (I can’t sleep well in trains), and I decide to go to college by 8:30am. But yeah, I did that.

I was super exhausted by the end of the day.


If you have been following me for over a year, and reading my life updates, you might know that I organized a couple hackathons. We decided to have another, and better, one this semester as well. And we chose this weekend.

We went bigger this time and kept the hackathon for a total of 42 hours! The hackathon started on Friday evening and will end this afternoon.

As I’m writing this, it’s 2:12 am because I’m staying overnight at college. The event has been going for about 30 hours now and everyone’s TIRED. The participants and the organizers. Everyone’s sleepy and exhausted. It’s seen on our faces. We can’t wait to go home lol. We need proper rest and proper sleep on actual beds. Many of my friends aren’t able to speak in proper sentences anymore.

I’m glad that this hackathon is going much better than our previous two, though. We actually improved. I wasn’t totally involved this time since I decided to step back and focus on other things. The rest of the team did a DAMN GOOD JOB. The event is going pretty good. There are a few problems, as always, but they’re manageable.

We just had a very tiring mentoring session which ran from 4:30 pm to 12:00 am. No I am not kidding. 50 teams, 5 mentors, and each had to talk to at least 3 mentors. That ate up time like nothing else.

We, the organizers, actually planned to have a small session of mock pitches so we can help the participants with their pitches. It was supposed to start at midnight but because the mentoring session ran VERY long, we scrapped it from the schedule for now. We may do it later but it depends on whether we have energy. (I doubt we will.)


Any free time I got in the nights, I either blogged or I worked on my project with my friends. I admit, I couldn’t do much because of the trip and the hackathon prep, but I did help a little bit. I found pockets of free time for that. Even if I wasn’t doing actual work, I was THINKING about it and that was enough to make me more tired. And we only had to make a presentation this time! Imagining the amount of work we have coming up… sigh.


I’m getting a new phone!!!!!!!!!!

I’m REALLY in need of one, y’all. My phone is horrid in terms of battery, has a very slow processing speed, and I don’t know how I’m surviving with this camera. My main problem is the battery and processing, though. I click tap an icon and have to wait for a bit for it to open. It’s annoying.

My dad offered to get me a new phone and I JUMPED on the chance. I spent a couple weeks scoping out phones and taking suggestions from people. The Samsing M30s released in my country on 18th Oct, and I was sold. 6000mAh battery, y’all. That had me sold.

One of my friends has the same phone as me and is facing the same issues as me. He really needs a new phone as well so both of us decided to get the M30s. We’re going from being Moto G4 plus buddies to Samsung M30s buddies, lol.

The phone went on sale TODAY at noon for Amazon prime customers, and we both were WAITING for it. We were worried that it would sell out fast because it’s a brilliant phone for the price. Almost too good to be true. Hence, we were on the Amazon page from 11:50 am.

The phones are arriving today sometime and I. CAN’T. WAIT. The anticipation is real. I really hope it arrives after I get home today evening because I don’t know how I will hold myself back from running home for it.

I honestly can’t wait to not carry around a power bank and not charge my phone at least twice a day. The one thing I’m SUPER excited about is a better camera. I’m getting a 48MP primary camera which is AWESOME. What an upgrade.

I think I’ve written enough in this post, so I won’t talk about the books I read this week. I don’t think it was much anyway.

I’ll probably need a whole day of rest after this week to re-energize. I haven’t caught up on my missing sleep, and I’m not sleeping a wink tonight. I’m actually quite energetic now since I’ve decided that I’m not going to sleep. If I make up my mind in advance, I can manage. (In fact, I didn’t sleep during the last hackathon as well.) Mondays classes will most likely be missed. I. need. sleep.

How was your week? Did anything monumental happen? Tell me!

Things I Could Do Instead of Reading

Reading is my life.

Books are what define me, at this point. I’ve been reading hardcore since I was in 6th grade, which was 10 years back! I’ve read so many books, and I’ve learnt so much from them. I’m known as the reader amongst my friends. Sure, there are a few others who read but none like me.

I put aside everything else to read. I read every spare moment I can. When I’m not reading, I talk about books. This blog is majorly about books, and I even have a bookstagram! If you asked my friends to tell one thing which defines me, they’d say books. They’d say that books are my life and I literally do not do anything else.

While I’m happy with my books, I do wonder what my life would be like if I didn’t read so much. What would I do? What would fill my days and nights? It’s a huge question mark. I cannot even remember how life was before I started reading, and I can’t imagine my future without books.

I read a post by Cotton Candy Book Witch on things she could do if she wasn’t reading, and it inspired to make my own list.

If I don’t read, I could…

Do an online course.

I’m being very academic and very college student, but it’s true. I’ve done a few online courses, but I’m actually in the middle of TWO MORE. But I have had zero progress on them recently because I don’t “find the time”. Basically, I choose reading over them.

If I didn’t read all the time, I could do online courses and learn so much more. Especially courses for my field. I really am interested in doing courses but I need some drive which makes me complete them. If I didn’t read books, I really think that I would spend time learning.

Try games

I am NOT into games. I barely even play mobile games. I used to be really into Wizard 101 back in 5th grade but I stopped it after a few months. Once I started reading, I haven’t touched a video game. A lot of my friends are gamers, and really enjoy it. I actually did try Dota once. I played a few bot games. But I didn’t like it, and I never felt like playing it again.

I stepped into video game waters again recently, this time I tried League of Legends. I played maybe four bot games. It’s not bad, but I again didn’t REALLY like it. I can see that it involves a lot of strategy and fast reflexes, but that’s not enough to get me to want to play it again. At least, not yet. I’ve decided that I’ll try a few more times before making a decision on giving up or continue playing.

I still prefer reading over playing. If I didn’t read, I might give a proper chance to gaming.

Picture of me reading.
Me whiling away my evenings by reading as usual 🙂

Make Art

I used to be very artsy. Painting was my favourite. In high school, I got into sketching. But sketching lasted a very short time since I was a HARD CORE READER then. I’d finish one book every two days. That left very less time for me to spend on art.

I believe that I still am artsy, or have the knack for art and design. But I don’t want to try more to make it a hobby. I do what little artsy things I can in my bullet journal, and that’s it. Compared to my primary school self who painted every two days and tried new things, I do absolutely nothing today.

And I think I’d really enjoy making art. I simply don’t take out the time for it.

Code More

If you don’t know, I’m a computer science and engineering student. Coding was not my first love like books, but I did take to it pretty fast. I remember learning programming for the first time in 11th grade, seeing words pop up the screen like I wanted them to, and it gave me a heady rush. I LOVED IT. I loved that I could make the computer do things, and that I could make small programs for myself.

Obviously, I can do a lot more now. I’m in my last year of college so it would be embarrassing if I didn’t lol.

If I didn’t read all the time, I would spend more time on competitive coding competitions or spend time on coding platforms online. I don’t do it regularly, but I do code VERY FEW TIMES. I enjoy coming up with solutions and trying again. I especially love coming up with many forms of logic and discussing about them with others. It’s definitely something I would spend my time on as a hobby/priority.

Go Out More

It’s true! I was very introverted before I started reading novels. But at least I wanted to be more social then. Since I started reading books, I substituted them in place of friends and a social life. For YEARS I did not seek social gatherings. I was happy at home reading.

I still am happy with my books by my own, but I recognize the importance of having a social life. I try more now. But, it’s still not as much. Until today, I prefer staying at home and reading than going out and visiting new places. My books gave me comfort and I’ve been choosing to stay in my comfort zone. There are so many places I want to visit, especially cafes and eateries in my city, but I barely go out!

It’s been better in the last year. I’ve spent a lot of quality time with people outside and have actually ventured to propose plans with other people. I doubt that I’ll choose going out over reading in the future, but I will be somewhere in between.

My friends and I on the day of the release of BTS's movie Love Yourself In Seoul this year
My friends and I on the day of the release of BTS’s movie Love Yourself In Seoul this year

And I think that’s it??? Its so hard to think about what I would do if I didn’t read! It’s all I know now. Reading has also brought me so many different types of hobbies (blogging, bookstagram, twitter, tumblr) and has introduced me to amazing people online.

Almost every aspect of my daily life has books in it somehow. Thinking about what I could do without books is truly hard. I only came up with 5 points! How disappointing.

Twitter | Instagram | Goodreads | Pinterest

What’s your main hobby, which you spend most of your time on? What could you do if you didn’t have that hobby? Do you relate to my clueless-ness? Tell me in the comments!

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The Sunday Post // books and so much Netflix

Happy Sunday y’all!

It’s been a hot minute since I did a Sunday Post. It’s one of my favourite kind of posts to do because 1) it’s easy to write about my life and 2) it’s almost like free writing. My words just flow most of the time.

The Sunday Post is a weekly blogging meme hosted by The Caffeinated Book Reviewer to update the internet on what we’ve been up to in the last week.


Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman

I read Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine the first half of the week. I really liked it. I loved the writing, the character, and especially Eleanor’s journey. My heart was full of emotion by the time I read the last line of the book.

I’m really glad that I picked up this book on impulse in the bookstore. It deserves so much more love than I’ve been seeing for it. I wrote a review on it as well. Click here to read my review.

The Poppy War by R. F. Kuang

I’m currently reading The Poppy War, which I started right after I finished Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine. I’m participating in the Autumn is for Asia read-a-long on Instagram which is a themed read-a-long. The hosts have picked books written by Asian authors which we plan to read this Autumn.

I even made a whole bullet journal page dedicated to the read-a-long because I’m really forward to reading all the books. I’m adding in my Instagram post below, which also has the hosts tagged in the caption so you can visit their accounts to check out the read-a-long book list!

Shameless self-plug: follow me on Instagram while you’re there!

I’m really enjoying The Poppy War! It’s pretty brutal about war and how the bloodshed and killings are. The author has also managed to bring in the emotions well in the book. I’m 79% into the book right now. Since the book is huge (it’s a tome, lol), I’m glad I’m reading it in my Kindle so I’m not intimidated by the size.

I’m really unsure how I’ll write a review for this book because SO MUCH happens, and there are several things that I want to talk about.



Earlier this week, I saw a clip on YouTube of Once Upon A Time which has Adelaide Kane in it. I was so surprised to see her! I stopped watching Once Upon A Time a long time back, I guess at season 3, but I really want to start it again. It looks like it’s still going good.

After I saw that, I searched for a video compilation of Francis and Mary from Reign (because I LOVED Adelaide Kane in Reign, and I really liked that show). I watched the show only until season 2 but I shipped Mary and Francis. I didn’t care about spoilers, so I just watched the video. And I was so surprised by a few things! It sparked my interest in watching Reign again, and hence I started watching it again from the beginning.

I only watched 3 episodes so far but I’m enjoying it a lot, just like the first time I saw it.

If you don’t know Reign: it’s a show based on the true story of Mary Stuart, Queen of Scots. It’s very engaging and entertaining to watch.

Queer Eye

I started watching Queer Eye a few weeks back, and I LOVE IT. A lot of bookstagrammers whom I follow recommend this show and I’m glad I listened to them. I finished season 1 pretty quick, but I’m crawling through season 2. Probably because I’m not in the mood to cry.

Queer Eye has, without fail, made me cry every single episode. It’s so emotional. I’m tearing up now just thinking about some scenes.

If you don’t know Queer Eye: 5 gay men make-over people who are stuck in their lives or require a little push to achieve their dreams. They make so much difference in the lives that they touch.

Falling Inn Love

Netflix recommended this movie to me. It sounded really good so I watched it, and I LOVED IT. This is such a good movie! I especially really liked the main character Gabriela. She’s stubborn, headstrong and so charming. Her romantic interest Jake perfectly complemented her. The chemistry was ON POINT.

The movie is a really nice rom-com to watch and chill. The amazing Australian accent helps too. I loved the accent lol.

If you don’t know Falling Inn Love: it follows Gabriela, who won an inn in New Zealand after she loses her job. She’s an architect and believes that this inn will be her dream project. While working on the inn, she ropes in the local carpenter Jake Taylor to help her. Between making plans and renovating the inn, romance sparks.

The movie also has EVERY CHEESY TROPE and I LOVE IT. It’s so cliche but I’m obsessed and want to rewatch it already.

Radio Rebel

I recommended this movie (which I’ve seem multiple times) to a friend two years back. He STILL hasn’t seen it, saying that he can’t find it. I looked it up and found that it’s on Netflix (!!!). LMAO. He was like damn I shall watch right now. Since it’s available, and I felt like it, I watched it as well. It’s been so long since I watched and I truly missed it.

If you don’t know Radio Rebel: Tara is a shy teen in high school who barely speaks to anyone except her friends, but is secretly a popular radio DJ. Her popularity starts to blow up even more once she joins her step dad’s radio channel. And her real life also starts to get real happening. Will she become confident in real life? Will she win over her crush? We’ll see!

Life As We Know It

I was scrolling through Netflix’s rom-coms and saw this one. I only watched this movie once a long time back on TV. I really liked it then, so I watched it again this week. If you can’t tell, I like to stick to movies that I like and don’t try new ones much.

It was super nice and gave me all the feels. I still really like this movie.

If you don’t know Life As We Know It: Holly and Eric hate each other ever since a disastrous first date which was set up by their best friends. As their best friends married and had a baby, they tolerate each other through insults. When their best friends pass away in a car accident, leaving them as the baby’s guardians, they have to step up. While managing a new life, a baby and also their careers, they begin to truly get to know each other.

Letters to Juliet

I felt like rewatching an old favourite again, so I went this one next. I absolutely love Amanda Seyfried, Vanessa Redgrave and Christopher Egan in the movie.

Watching it again was almost like watching it for the first time because it’s been a long time since I last saw it. The romance, the relationships, and the unending hope warmed my heart.

If you don’t know Letters to Juliet: While on vacation in Verona, Sophie encounters a group of women who call themselves the “Secretaries of Juliet” and respond to the letters written to Juliet by tourists. She helps them one day and discovers a 50 year old letter hidden behind rocks. When she replied to it, the woman from the letter and her grandson show up! The woman, Claire, wants to find her love from 50 years back whom she left behind. Sophie goes along with Clair and her grandson Charlie on an adventure to find Lorenzo Bartolini.

The Age of Adaline

This was recommended to me by Netflix a couple days back. I was intrigued by the synopsis, and it has Blake Lively, so I watched it. It was actually pretty good! I really liked Blake Lively’s acting. The movie leaves you feeling very hopeful in the end, and that’s nice.

If you don’t know The Age of Adaline: The movie follows Adaline Bowman, who stopped aging in her late twenties due to dying and being revived through lightning underwater. She changes identities and location every 10 years to make sure that no one suspects anything. But she’s tired of running, especially after meeting a very charming man. Will she get her happily ever after? Is she strong enough to tell her truth and take a shot at love? Watch to find out.

Wow I spoke so much about movies. This blog post is basically just about the movies I watched lol.


I got through week 2 of college, and it’s boring as heck. It’s nice to see my friends everyday but I’m just not able to become enthusiastic about my subjects yet. I hope I can get motivated to study them soon, though. We started classes a whole month late and will be going really fast.

I don’t have anything else to say. Life is just.. going on.

How was your week? Update me on your life in the comments!

About Beginnings

Note: This is another rambly post.

How do you start something?

Be it a project, a semester, a blog post, or even a conversation with someone new. How do you start it? More specifically, how do you feel before, during, and right after “the beginning”?

Beginnings are defining points in our lives. There are an infinite number of beginnings—small and big—and just as each decision we take in our lives create ripple effects, every beginning creates a unique path for you to go on. Depending on how beginnings go, your path either widens or narrows. It’s very interesting, if you overthink beginnings and imagine the scenarios that may occur.

I’m overthink often, but not in panic or anxiety. When I find myself with a pocket of free time, my mind goes to various scenarios that could occur. I won’t lie, most of my imaginations are negative. I think about how situations can worsen or what would be worst case scenarios. And then, I think about how I would deal with those situations. It’s a weird coping mechanism. Since I know what I will do in advance, I feel better going into whatever situation. Mentally, I’m prepared for the worst.

I’m the same with beginnings. Even if I’m just talking to a new person, I rephrase my first text or sentence to them multiple times until it sounds right. If I’m contacting someone professionally, I’m ready for them to not reply or reply negatively. I used to do this with friends as well, if I asked them favours, but I’ve managed to curb this habit of mine a little now.

What differs with decisions and beginnings, is that I believe I can somehow control a beginning such that I can turn my life to the path I want to go on. With decisions, it’s different. I can’t see exactly what will happen with decisions, I can’t predict the ripple effects they create. I feel like I can control my narrative with beginnings, but I can’t do that with decisions.

How we feel during beginnings largely contributes to the result. I’ve noticed that when I feel confident about my ability to turn things to my dream, everything goes smoothly. And even if it doesn’t, I’m okay with it. And I feel confident when I have multiple worst case scenarios thought out in my head.

Even when I had interviews recently, I thought about what I would do if I couldn’t answer a technical question, or how I would behave if the interviewer is rude. I ran through every situation I thought would catch me off-guard, and I prepared for it. I was actually pretty confident in the interviews. I mostly didn’t lose my calm. This tactic works for me.

Lately, I’ve had a lot of free time without a goal that needs to be accomplished soon. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking. Thinking about how things may have been different if I had a different attitude, or if I acted another way.

Usually, I’m not an overthinker. I revolve around productivity. Checking off tasks gives me satisfaction, a weird high. And I run behind that as much as I can. I barely take some time for myself, to simply think. I used to but I don’t anymore.

While I’m not very happy about my current lackluster days, I think they have been good because I needed this time to simply introspect. Two years back I used to take an hour a week to myself every week, just letting my thoughts run. Now I barely find an hour to blog during the semester. I actually needed these lackluster days to chill out and let myself breathe for a bit.

Now I’m mentally fully prepared to go into the next semester. I’m mentally prepared for the stress of working on two projects along with having a shorter semester. I’m prepared to not have a break after the next semester because I know that I’ll have to immediately start my 6 month internship. I wasn’t prepared like this for the last year, and I had multiple breakdowns throughout the year. I had to take multiple time-outs.

At this moment, I’m super confident that I’ll do amazing in this semester and I will have most of my shit together. I’m prepared for it. And because I’m prepared, I’m confident. This confidence makes all the difference. I recognize that.

Anyway, yeah. My point was meant to be that what you feel when starting something makes a huge difference in the path you take.

Being nostalgic

Oh my goodness, y’all. I am feeling so nostalgic right now.

It’s been a slow day, so far. I mentioned in my last post that I have a sudden vacation upon me without plans. I’ve been trying to keep myself mildly busy, though. I’ve been reading, reviewing and working on Instagram. I tried making elaborate picture settings for the first time, and they look really nice! My mum has been giving me chores to do to fill my time as well.

But I still have pockets of time where I don’t have anything to do and I don’t feel like starting something new. A while back, I found myself in that mood and decided to go through my old posts on this blog. I went way back to January 2016. My first post was on January 16th, 2016. I was 17, studying for my last high school finals. My main intention was to see how far I’ve come, to see if there’s a difference in my writing style or my content. I found what I was looking for, but I was not ready to be impacted so much by my own writing.

Reading through those old posts felt like reading an old journal, only I’m not just chronicling the events that occurred and my feelings at that time, but also my thought process. I was was reviewing books like I continue to do now, but I was also WRITING so much. Writing poems, short stories, small pieces based on daily prompts.

Once I started reading, I couldn’t stop. I went on to reading posts from February 2016, and this post just made me stop and think. I can’t even remember the last time I thought so much, about abstract things, let alone write about them. I also used to blog every single day. I didn’t worry about word counts or whether people of the internet will like this post that I’m writing. I just typed whatever I felt like, and hit publish.

Once I got the hang of blogging then, I even started writing posts on my phone! Anytime inspiration struck, I whipped out my phone and started typing. This post was written when I was walking home from my best friend’s place, and I literally just wrote about what I was thinking as I walked. Now, I look back and remember that once college started, I used to blog on my phone when I was in the bus.

Thoughts about formatting, grammar and proof-reading used to not hit me. I just wrote and published. Reading those posts makes me miss that so badly. I miss writing without a care about how I would be perceived. I miss writing.

Granted, back then my blog had a different name and no one from real life knew that I had a blog. I even blogged under an alias. It was my special corner of the internet. I did not have to worry about what people would think about me because anonymity is freeing.

At this point, I can’t even remember when I last wrote something just for the act of writing. I cannot remember the last time I thought about abstract concepts, or the last time I took 10 minutes to just think.

Back then, I wrote a post on slowing down time based on a writing prompt. I wrote that I loved walking alone, and that it allowed me to think. I wrote that everyone rushes to complete things in life and don’t take a minute to breathe, and how I make sure to take out time for myself. But today, I have become the exact opposite. I run around, trying to get things done in time and manage multiple things. I’ve become a productivity-oriented person, feeling satisfied when I’ve finished doing a bunch of tasks. It’s come to the point that now, I feel lost when I have a vacation without plans.

It doesn’t escape me that the old me would have loved to have time without set deadlines or tasks.

After a while of reading old posts and ruminating about the change in me, I became motivated to write for the first time in what feels like forever. This post that you’re reading right now will not be formatted, or proof-read. I did not decide beforehand about what I would write. I just opened up the WordPress editor and started typing. And it feels so damn good. I literally have a small smile on my face right now and my fingers are typing so fast.

Right before writing this, I checked out posts under the “writing” tag on WordPress. I used to do this a lot before, and it used to inspire me to write more. I also found such amazing blogs. So I decided to do it again, and I found these two posts:

And that was all the push I needed to start writing.

My blog has changed shape so much. I have tonnes of content now that wouldn’t have even occurred to me three years back. I share my bullet journal, I talk about Kdramas and I share my music. I do think that my reviewing style has grown. I love using images and different colours in my post. The way I review has changed, and definitely for the better.

But for the first time, I’m looking back and I’m seeing what I lost during the last two years. I stopped writing. I stopped wondering. And I started second-guessing my content. I started questioning whether people will like and want to read my blog post before even writing one word.

My content today and my content from 2016 are vastly different. So much that they look like they’re of two different blogs. But it’s the same me.

I have grown in many aspects, but I now also want to bring back some of my old self. And since this blog is mine, and it’s still my special corner of the internet, I’m not afraid to change it’s shape again.

To whoever is reading this, I don’t know when you started following me. Maybe this is the first time you’re here, or maybe you’ve been following me since the beginning. Thank you for taking the time to read my words, and i hope you will continue to read them even if they sound different.

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if we were having tea… // 13-08-19

Hey everyone!

It’s been a hot minute since I last posted a life update and SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED. I have a lot to tell y’all. I’m pretty sure that I’ll be talking more than usual and will ramble a lot so bear with me.

If we were having tea… the first thing I would tell you about is MY JOB. If you’ve read my last chatty post, you would know that I was heading into job tests and interviews. I was super nervous.

Well, guess what? Ya girl now has a job in line for her to start right after she graduates next year! Yeah, I know, it’s weird to apply for jobs a whole year in advance but India is weird and things work differently here.

The first company that I sat for did not take me. We had totally four founds to get through, which included a test, a group discussion and two interviews. It took place over one day so the day was looong. After each round the number of students narrows down. I stayed until after the last round and got rejected. I was so disappointed and sad. By the time I left for home, I had been at college for 12 hours, and I was hungry and tired.

I took the rest of the night off to wallow in disappointment. I also took the next day off because my cousin came to visit us and we took him around the city. When I finally did have the time to study for the next company, I didn’t feel like it at all. I did not want to be rejected again. I texted an SOS to my friend and asked him to somehow convince me to show up the next day. Thankfully, he managed to convince me. (Thanks smn!)

I showed up the next day much less nervous than I was before. I was ready for disappointment this time around, and hence was calm. I also had some confidence because out of the 150 students who applied last time, I was in the last 15. So I knew that I can do it again. And I did!

The second company had a test and two to three interviews, varying for different people based on the impression we made during the first interview. I’m totally gloating here but I had only two, and I was super confident after the second one that I would get the job. I was right.

7 other students got offers along with me, including two of my friends. The team from the company who came for the recruitment process even took us all out for dinner and drinks! It was 8pm by that point and all of us were starving. It was such a good day. The team looked super chill and fun to be around. I really liked the vibe. I’m pretty sure I’m going to like working with them. I’m super excited.

happy dance gif

If we were having tea… the second thing you’d find out about is my lack of motivation recently. My whole plan for this month was just study and attend tests and interviews. But suddenly, I have my whole month free.

There’s this rule that I can’t apply to any other company through my college-organized drives unless the company offers at least some amount more than my current job offer. And for every company that fulfills that rule, my gpa is too low to be eligible for it. It’s a hard place to be.

I checked the schedule and I’m not eligible or any other company coming this month. I suddenly have my whole month free and I DON’T HAVE PLANS. I usually make plans before or I write down what I need to do. I did not keep any other plan intentionally because I wanted to concentrate on getting a job. And that got done by the 5th of this month.

I spent a coupled days chilling and being happy. By the third day, I was BORED. I’m a productivity-oriented person so I can’t sit doing nothing for long. Even blogging and reading doesn’t feel as productive because I’m used to studying and doing assignments all the time. It’s been a while since I truly got a vacation without having anything to do.

Thankfully, plans for the next BTS movie came up (more on this later) and I had a two-day festival at home so I could keep myself a little busy. But now that both of them are done, I’m again staring at a totally free month without plans yet. And by plans, I mean ones that get me out of the house. I do have things to do, but they can be done at home as well. I can’t stay at home for days together if my mum’s at home as well. I’m not used to it.

I’m considering going to cafes with my laptop and books some days if I’m really desperate to get out. But I’ve never done that before and.. I’m just not an outgoing person. Arghh. Someone volunteer to spend time with me, please.

falling face down onto bed gif

If we were having tea… you would hear me gush about BTS and their latest movie, along with what I did on the day of the movie. BTS’s third movie Bring The Soul started playing in theatres in my city from last Wednesday but I was able to go with my friends only on Sunday.

First, let me tell you about the movie. It was really nice. It followed the band through a part of their Love Yourself tour in the US and UK. It was kind of like their first movie, Burn The Stage. We also saw clips of some performances. But my favourite parts of the movie were when we got to see them interact and have fun. At the end, they added a whole bunch of funny clips which made us all laugh.

Every time a BTS movie plays in theatres, ARMYs all over India host a ton of activities. The Bangalore ARMYs usually have flash mobs, meet-ups, and some ARMYs even sell BTS merchandise. We turn the movie days into event days because we are starved for BTS events.

For the last two movies, my friends and I got a few BTS badges and sold them at the location we went to. They actually sold like hot cakes. We did the same this time as well, but with totally new designs. We made badges of BT21 (cartoon characters that BTS members made up) this time, along with two of BTS. Totally, we made 300 badges containing 11 designs and sold them that day. It was pretty tiring since we ran around all day and sold in three different malls.

the badges that we made this time
the badges that we made this time!

We also made a few freebies with BTS photos, a polaroid marking the date and a quote. Since we had only 51 of them, we had ARMYs play rock paper scissors against other ARMYs whom they’ve never met before in order to win a freebie. It turned out to be quite fun! It also got people socializing more.

I meant to take pictures of the badges on that day for Instagram but totally forgot in the process of selling. It was a good day, though. I’m glad that we got to meet other ARMYs, who are generally really sweet and eager to meet other fans.

picture of BTS on a stage

If we were having tea.. I would tell you that I have a TON of BTS merchandise now! None of it is official merchandise, but still! Honestly, I am not sure what I’ll even do with all of them. Along with some photos that I got printed and some of our badges, there are a ton of things which I got as freebies from other ARMYs over the three BTS movies’ days. One of my friends has made a BTS shrine in her home, with one whole wall dedicated to BTS photos. And she has a LOT of them.

I’m not someone who will put up pictures of celebrities on her wall and make a shrine or anything. I may put up some, but definitely not many. So I’ve decided to give some of my stuff to another ARMY friend of mine, whom I know from school. She mentioned that she doesn’t have any merch and was unable to watch the movies and get freebies, so I’m giving her mine. I’m sure she will love them much more than I will.

all my BTS merch!
all my BTS merch!

If we were having tea… you would find out that I finished listening to my first ever audiobook. I’ve tried audiobook once previously, with Outlander by Diana Gabaldon. I stopped that very soon but I do think it’s because of the book.

This time, I listened to The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid on audiobook, and the experience was so-so. I really liked the book, but I definitely would have finished it faster had I read it. I’m not an audiobook person. I love listening to music when doing things so it took me around 3 weeks to finish the book.

I read The Poet X on my Kindle but people told me to try the audiobook since it’s really good. I did try, but I found that I liked my own voice when reading the book and stopped listening pretty soon. Audiobooks are nice for some situations but I don’t think I’ll continue my subscription after this month. I’d much rather read and listen to music or podcasts.

This post has become really looong. I did warn you beforehand, though. Thanks for sticking with me until the end! I’m tired after writing so much and don’t have the energy to proof-read through this. I’m sorry for any typos that exist!

What would you tell me if we were having tea right now?

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if we were having tea… // 21-7-19

Happy Sunday everyone!

I first saw this post over at Cotton Candy Book Witch, and I loved the idea. I’ve since seen it in many other blogs, sometimes with the coffee version. I want to get back into posting casual posts talking about life and other things, and this is the perfect way to do it.

Since I’m going to turn this into a series of posts, I spent way too much time deciding whether to go for the tea or the coffee version. I like both unbiased, but I feel more relaxed and chatty when having tea so I went with that. I usually only drink coffee for the taste (caffeine doesn’t work on me) and it wouldn’t be my drink of choice to have during a casual chat.

If we were having tea… I’d tell you that I’m currently sick. I have a cold and throat infection, and I seem to be on track for getting these every month. I didn’t go to college yesterday, preferring to stay and home and recuperate because I have many important dates coming up. I can’t afford to be sick and unable to talk.

If we were having tea… I would talk about having breakfast out this morning. I woke up early and went on a breakfast date with my mum to the nearby club restaurant. It was really nice. We sat outside with trees around us, birds chirping and butterflies flying around. The sounds from the dining hall (where many other people were sitting) were muted, making up the perfect ambiance.

If we were having tea… you would hear me talk about doing better at blogging after several months. For the past few months I had posted only 5 times and there was a month when I posted nothing, too. But this month I’ve managed to post more and I’m happy with my content. My blog is getting more views as well.

If we were having tea… I would talk about loving the Youngblood album by 5 Seconds of Summer. I had heard only Youngblood (the song) from it before, and found it okay then, but now I’m LOVING it. My favourite songs are If Walls Could Talk, Youngblood and Ghost of You. Ghost of You sounds like a song which would totally fit in with One Tree Hill‘s soundtrack. In fact, the first time I heard it, I actually had One Tree Hill scenes running in my head. It brought back nostalgia because I used to love OTH.

If we were having tea… I would say that I did a test to check my thyroid recently. My TSH levels are at an all time low. It was 0.01 last time I tested (Oct 2018) but now the result shows <0.008 which means it was so less that they couldn’t calculate accurately. In my worry for my autoimmune disorder and my swelling which I spoke about in my last life update, I neglected thyroid and it shows. Sigh.

If we were having tea… you might have noticed that the swelling on my throat has gone down significantly. That’s because I went back to homeopathic medicine (which I trust and which works for me). After only a month of taking the meds, the swelling has gone down enough that I wear my hair up in a bun again, not trying to hide it. Alopathy/”English” doctors told me that there are no medicines and I HAVE to do a surgery, which will leave me with a long scar. I didn’t want to go for surgery in a hurry just yet, so I tried homeopathy again and I’m so glad. Even my friends around me notice the difference.

If we were having tea… I wouldn’t talk about Kdramas and that’s because I have stopped watching them. Not only them, I haven’t watched anything in a long time. I don’t have the mood to sit and passively watch something. I have many shows lined up but don’t feel like watching them just yet. And I’m not sad about it. It means I have time to spend on better things, so that’s good.

If we were having tea… I would talk about being nervous for the upcoming month. My friends and I have placements, meaning companies will come to recruit almost-graduates. We will have a bunch of tests and interviews for every company. I’m nervous because my GPA is not good enough for really good jobs, and I’m still unsure of my skill sheet. Will what I know so far be enough? My batchmates are all studying and doing courses, practicing coding, and doing a bunch of stuff to upskill themselves while I seem to be stuck worrying about my health half the time. I know that I’m good in some things, but not enough and not at all of what’s expected.

If we were having tea… I’d say that I have taken out more time this month to blog hop and work a little on my blog besides posting. I’ve visited so many blogs recently, and commented a lot. I forgot how nice it feels to read blogs. One night when I had to study but didn’t feel like, I adopted a quiz-read blog-repeat routine and it truly helped! I would take a quiz for a topic that I needed to know for next day’s test for around 20 minutes, and take a break for 10 minutes visiting blogs, and move on to another study topic. I should do things like this more often.

If we were having tea… I’d mention that my aunt came to visit us. She arrived last month and is staying until tomorrow afternoon. It’s really nice to have her around because I really like her, and my mum has company to go out and stuff. But it’s also not that great because she talks a LOT. Meaning, she doesn’t ever stop. And I hate that. It gives me a headache. I feel bad for this but I’m glad I have college so I don’t have to listen to her all day. I’m a quiet person who doesn’t like to talk all the time. I need peace and space.

If we were having tea… you would have found out that I’m feeling discouraged about Instagram. My stats are at an all-time low, and my engagement is almost nothing. I went back to my posts till the beginning of this year and noticed that my stats and engagement have been going down since then, no matter my theme and content. It discourages me that no matter what I do, it’s not liked by people. I’m even considering giving up but I love bookstagram too much. I don’t know what to do anymore.

If we were having tea… I would say that I took a cheat day from my gluten-free diet yesterday! My best friend’s birthday was yesterday hence I planned to take my cheat day so we could celebrate together. I had a couple small pieces of cake and pizza with my best friends.

What would you tell me if we were having tea (or coffee) right now?

Songs on repeat header

Songs On Repeat // April ’19 edition

Hey everyone!

It’s been a while since I did a post on my favourite songs of the month i.e. the songs I listened to on repeat. I was not sure if I’d do this month as well because I wasn’t sure I’ll have the time. BUT. I have such good songs to share with y’all this month that I made time.

So, let’s get started! I’m going to separate the songs into categories according to the language to make it easier for y’all.


Just My Type by The Vamps

I absolutely LOVE the chorus of this song. It falls into place SEAMLESSLY. I don’t care for the lyrics much but the melody always gets me dancing and singing along.

Audio by LSD ft. Sia, Diplo, Labrinth

Okay so I LOVE THIS SONG. Spotify introduced me to this song and I’m forever grateful. I’m actually listening to it right now with my friends on Discord. I love the lyrics, I like the tunes, I liked the voices, the EDM.. everything.

Genius by LSD ft. Sia, Labrith, Diplo

This played after Audio and I fell in love with it immediately. I love the vibes of it, and how catchy it is. I found myself singing the chorus at random times after first listening to the song. I think I love this more than Audio.

New by Daya

This is really catchy in a melodic way. This was included in my Daily Mix on Spotify and I got drawn into it immediately. The lyrics are very easy to memorize and sing-along to. I listen to it now and then sometimes just because the vibe is really nice.


Kill This Love

I took a while to watch this after it released but when I did, I was BLOWN AWAY. It’s been two weeks or so and I’m STILL not over it. When I workout or in the morning when I need to get energized, I listen to this absolute bop and it ALWAYS works. It’s way too good. I have most of the choreo memorized as well.


While the Map of the Soul: Persona album has some really good songs, Dionysus is my favourite. It’s another song that’s a pure bop which energizes me every time I listen to it. I play this and Kill This Love on loop.

When I first listened to it on Spotify, I merely liked it. But when the live performance video came out on YouTube, the song put itself in my favourites list. I’ve attached a live performance video above and it’s AMAZING. Their performance was SO GOOD. It requires so much practice and stamina to sing while doing those steps. Oh wow.

Reset by Tiger JK ft. Jinsil

I found this song through the Kdrama School 2015: Who Are You and it’s SO GOOD. It gives me so many feels and I was obsessed with this for quite a while. I still listen to this from time-to-time.

If you’re looking for good Korean melodies that have a bit of rap and have great choruses, definitely try this one.

Beside Me by DAVICHI

This is the song I’m currently playing on repeat all day. I found this on Spotify when I was playing songs by this artist duo on radio, and I did not get ahead of this song. I just got stuck there, playing it on repeat.

Pray by Younha

I got this song from School 2015: Who Are You as well. Once I my obsession with Reset started going down, I fell in love with this. It’s a slow, soothing song that’s also kinda sad. It’s perfect for some specific moods. I listen to it when I’m nostalgic or it’s raining or when I’m looking out the window while in bus.


Dope Track by Yuvan Shankar Raja

I finally felt brave enough to try the Tamil playlists that Spotify has and I found this gem. When I mentioned that I liked this, my best friend was surprised. I’m not a huge fan of Tamil music, and I mostly just listen to what she recommends, but I liked this immediately. Especially chorus.

And that ends my list for this month! That was a lot, lol. I usually fall in love with songs really quick and listen to it on repeat. Then, when my obsession starts to die down, I listen to Daily Mixes and playlists until I find the next repeat-worthy song.

What songs did you listen to on repeat this month? Do we share any? Tell me in the comments!